I bought a $2 ruler accidentally

Sometimes in life, you find yourself doing the most dastardly forehead-smacking deeds.

YOU DO. Even if you refuse to admit it.

C’mon, say you do and make me feel a little less alone.

In return, I will reveal some of the less incriminating ones that happened to me.

(Can’t talk about the truly embarrassing ones because I’ve managed to wipe them almost clean from my memory. My shrink says that’s the only way to avoid being an inmate in his happy house.)

I was shopping at Daiso (the $2 shop) for boxes/trays/baskets to put in my new wall shelf. I’ve got all the measurements down. Box #1 needs to be this height and length and width. Tray #2 needs to be this and that and that.

But I had forgotten to bring my measuring tape.

So I came up with the brilliant idea to borrow a 12″ ruler from Daiso’s stationery section.

It worked! And I got my stuff.

Chucking the ruler into my shopping basket, I continued shopping, intending to return the ruler when I passed through the stationery section again.

When I got home that night, I found a 12″ ruler sitting in one of my shopping bags.

“When the hell did I buy a ruler?” was my first thought.

It took a few seconds for the realisation to dawn on me. Yes, I’m that slow.

“ARRGHH!” was my next thought.

Followed by rolling of eyes, gnashing of teeth and smacking of forehead.

Oh, well. At least this new ruler looks a bit nicer than my current one.

And now, a literally forehead-smacking incident.

It was during one of my first dates with the Goonfather a few years back. Till today, he wouldn’t stop reminding me of it, the rascal.

We had gone to Rocky Master (outside Cineleisure) for a drink, and I couldn’t resist checking out the cakes on display.

“Ooh pretty cakes!” I exclaimed excitedly.

My exclamation was followed immediately by a very loud “THUNK!!” as my head smacked rudely into the invisible glass divider in front of the cake display as I bent forward to study the cakes.

It was so loud that the whole cafe turned silent for a few seconds as everyone turned towards the source of the sound.

“OMG are you alright?” asked the waitress and the Goonfather simultaneously.

Yes, fine, thanks, unbruised except for my ego.

A similar incident happened two weeks ago at my DOP’s apartment where we had retired to have dinner between filming.

I wanted to go into the kitchen to throw out some rubbish, but he has an invisible glass sliding door guarding his kitchen.

I literally walked into the door, producing a sound and sensation all to familiar to me.

“THUNK!” and a dull throb all over.

Followed by a few seconds of stunned silence and then, “OMG ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!?!?”

Fortunately, in all my glass smacking endeavours, I never managed to break anything.

Imagine the cost of repairs.