My love story (abridged)

I didn’t intend to blog about my relationship with Piers until much later because I thought it would make a better story later. It’s only a good story after it’s lasted for a while, isn’t it?

But I was shocked by the response when we “announced” our status in Facebook.

I kind of did it out of mischievous impulse. Did it in the middle of the night when I thought no one would notice cos people were either asleep or out partying and wouldn’t be checking Facebook.

Thought the status update would pass by unseen and get buried. And then maybe some time later, a friend might accidentally notice it in my profile and kinda do a double take and that would be very funny to me.

So I was really shocked when, within seconds of posting, friends started liking it and commenting on it. It made me kind of embarrassed. Piers and I were OMG-ing away to each other on MSN as more and more responses came in.


Facebook status


Of course, it made me happy to have nice, supportive friends. Was just very embarrassed about people making a big deal.

So, anyway, we have a story but I still think I should tell the full version later cos it’s very long and convoluted.

So here is a short version. I think people are expecting it.



Piers and Sheylara


We’ve been friends on Plurk for almost two years now. We were both attached when we knew each other. But even if we hadn’t been, I doubt we’d have had been attracted to each other romantically, seeing as how we were from different sides of the world and seemingly completely different people, and I didn’t fancy dating Caucasians, having tried it once ages ago.

So, when he invited me to England, it was innocent. He knew from Plurk that I needed to get away from Singapore, and his parents needed a housesitter while they all went away on holiday, so it was a perfect plan.

He was single then. I was attached but precariously so. When I arrived in England, I continued having trouble with my relationship and we finally broke up for good. That was like the fifth breakup in a span of three months or so and I felt I needed to let go of it completely and finally or be traumatised by it forever.

Then Piers came back from his holiday and we started hanging out. He wasn’t wooing me or anything. He was just being a nice English gentleman. He stayed at his parents’ house while I stayed in his apartment.

We got along very well and discovered we were alike in so many ways. I discovered that he had more Asian values than many Asians I knew so, by the middle of the week, I fell in love with him. But I didn’t do anything because I’m always too shy to make the first move, plus I didn’t think he’d be interested in me at all.

He, on the other hand, found me attractive but thought I’d never be interested in him, so was totally happy with just being good friends with me.

But maybe the mutual attraction grew stronger and stronger. Near the time I was supposed to return to Singapore, we suddenly found ourselves holding hands and kissing (in very G-rated ways!!!). He is such a perfect gentleman it’s almost hard to believe it.


Piers and Sheylara


Okay, this is a bit embarrassing so I will move on.

(He hates that photo. I think he’s gonna kill me for putting it up, haha.)

((Maybe he will kill me for blogging this at all!))

Some of you might think I was on the rebound but it wasn’t like that. Can’t really explain it without going into detail.

So I extended my stay in England and we got closer every day.

Now that I’m back in Singapore and we’re missing each other like crazy, we cannot deny that we’re madly in love and totally committed to each other and willing to brave a long distance relationship.

Hence the Facebook status.

Okay, that’s all. Yes, that was the super short version of the story and it’s already so long.

That’s why I never intended to blog about it until much later… when I have time to write a book… if we’re still together by then… which I hope we will… because it’s quite a crazy story. To us, anyway.

Don’t know what else to say now.

Never blogged about my love life before so it’s a bit weird!

Women fall for jerks

I have to admit that I do like a little bad in my boy.

Playful, cheeky, irreverent, smooth and charming, bold and daring, even chauvinistic.

Bad boys embody masculinity because they are confident and in full control of themselves. Women like that.

Colin Farrell

But there can be too much of a good thing. Too much bad and a guy becomes a total jerk. Not attractive.

I believe the clichéd viewpoint that women fall for jerks comes from the fact that women cannot tell real jerks from real men.

Continue reading…

The Goonfather wants me to micro-manage him

The Goonfather is the strangest man I’ve ever known.

He is the first (and possibly last) man I know who will complain when he doesn’t get nagged at.

“Why you never nag at me to [insert random command such as ‘Stop playing game, it’s bad for your eyes’]?”

I’d be, like, “Who the hell wants to be nagged at?”

He would say, “Me.”

“Huh???” I would retort.

“You must micro-manage me. It shows you care about me.”


I get this quite a lot because I do not nag, period. I am a firm believer of non naggage. I generally believe in letting people do what they want to do because I want to do what I want to do, myself.

Unless someone does something that severely compromises my comfort or safety or whatever, I’ll usually just leave him alone.

Once in a while, I will try to nag at him to make him happy.

“Go and study. If not you fail your test tomorrow.”

But it is so not in my nature to do such a thing, in fact, it is so against my nature to nag, that I often forget to do it. I find it hard to convince myself that he enjoys it.

So he ends up always nagging at me to nag at him.

I’m in the strangest relationship, ever.

Are Singapore men romantic?

Sometimes, I feel like the male prototype in my relationships because I’m usually the practical, geeky one who prefers to stay home and play games rather than engage in romantic activities, indoors or outdoors.

But that’s not to say that I spurn romance. I have done a lot of romantic things for my partners but the truth is that gaming appeals to me a lot more than, say, a candlelight dinner under the stars.

I think this arrangement suits the guys I’ve gone out with. I have a soft spot for geeky gamer types so there’s usually no problem with my gaming obsession. But, surprisingly, the gamers I’ve gone out with have all displayed a capacity for romance which probably exceeds mine.

Continue reading…