Exposé on Sheylara

This was the hardest topic ever I had to write for Star Blog.

Star Blog

The deadline was Monday morning and I didn’t start writing it until Monday morning (that is, I did it after midnight before going to bed). =D

We were supposed to pretend to be a writer doing a profile on ourselves for a publication, highlighting our strengths and weaknesses and achievements.

I sweated over it all weekend and lamented to my friends. It brought back memories of when I had to write my first resumes. I could never do it right.

Stressed

I would show it to someone and he would say, “What kind of lousy resume is this!! Who wants to employ you like this! You must blow your own trumpet!”

I would wail, “I cannot lah! It’s against my nature!”

And he would insist, “You MUST if you ever want to get a job.”

It was the hardest thing for me to do and I wanted to quit job hunting forever. I might have if Singapore had welfare.

Welfare

I was lucky in that many of my first few day jobs were gotten through friend recommendations (mostly writing and web design jobs, which didn’t require mind-blowing resumes as much as spiffy portfolios).

I’m quite comfortable at writing decent resumes now, after years of practice at breaking the stubborn shell of humility off myself, but writing an interview article about myself is something else.

I waited until I was about to collapse from exhaustion before writing it so that I would be somewhat numbed to the horror of the job.

Sleepy

I’ve done many profiles on celebrities during my times as a journalist, so writing profiles is chicken feed for me. But I used to always praise my subjects to the skies and make them sound really good. (It’s also against my nature to make someone sound bad.)

So, it was really, really tricky. How to do a good job at this assignment and yet avoid being totally shameless?

In the end, I still managed to get it done. I’m a stickler for meeting deadlines, if nothing else.

If you’re curious to see what kind of work I can produce while sleep-deprived, CLICK HERE TO READ IT.

Sheylara

The babe collectors won’t stop

Gamer Girl Friday will be late today. We apologise for the inconvenience caused. Check back some time in the evening!

In other news, I think I’d better stop blogging about Facebook pervs. It seems to be getting me even more friend requests than ever.

These people do like to torment me so. I just got this one whose friends list is scary. He’s got almost 700 friends and half of them are bikini-clad, cleavage-revealing babes. Yikes.

[can we be fren?]

I have a theory that most of these girls are actually men who created sexy female profiles just for kicks and pepper their profiles with photos of unknown but cute Japanese AV stars to lure babe collectors for fun.

Why else would they allow themselves to be collected by pervs?

One day, someone is gonna make a profession and make money out of babe collecting.

To quote Cowboy Caleb, there is no hope for the human race.

Presenting… MeTube!

I just uploaded a YouTube video for the first time in my life. Not that YouTube has been around long enough for that to be a remarkable statement, but you know what I mean.

Anyway, it’s a video clip I’m not extremely proud of, so when I had to fill in the field called “Tags”, I only typed “Qiaoyun” because I don’t want the clip to be searchable and watched by strangers. I’m assuming that nobody would ever do a search for “Qiaoyun” in YouTube because it’s a weird sort of word to begin with.

So. This is a one-minute video of me giving a meaningless self-intro.

You see, I had to e-mail a production house a showreel so I can be shortlisted to go for an audition. But I don’t have a showreel because I’ve been having trouble editing my mpeg2 files (direct recordings of my TV shows) and rendering them into a compressed and viewable form.

To cut the boring technical story short, I had to quickly record an emergency video of myself using my digital camera. The casting lady said I could just shoot a quick-and-dirty self-intro because they just want to see my “video presence”.

So here’s my quick-and-dirty.

If you’re planning to offer up some constructive criticism, please bear in mind that this video isn’t meant to be the least bit entertaining. It’s meant to show how I look on video.

If you’re watching only so you can laugh at me, well, okay, that’s allowed. I do that to other people all the time so I suppose I deserve some retribution.

Have I mentioned how I hate doing self-intros? Yes, I have.

I think I’d drop dead and die if I ever got to watch all the millions of self-intros I’ve done in my life, at production houses and studios. Okay, few hundred is a more accurate number, but the point is that I’ve been doing self-intros all my life and I have yet to reach a point where I feel comfortable giving one.

I just don’t like talking about myself, you know. I mean, verbally. I don’t mind writing about myself, you realise.

Anyway, self-intros suck. Unfortunately, they’re a necessary occupational hazard.

They’re a hazard to me because, like I said, I’d drop dead and die if I ever have to watch any one of them.

Vincent told me he’s watched one of my audition tapes. I think I should kill him for that. You think?