GGF#43: Gamers choose games over sex

[Gamer Girl Friday]

Over a thousand men (in relationships) were recently polled on a British website to find out if men would rather play video games or have sex with their partners.

32% said they’d rather play games.

Which is a pretty moderate statistic. What’s more remarkable is that the number shot up drastically when the game in question was a new game.

72% of the respondents said they would rather play a new video game than play bedroom games with their partners.

This tells me one thing: There is hope yet for mankind.

Google has the full report.

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Table of Contents

  1. Larry is back!
  2. Time Wasters by Swordplay
  3. Plants vs. zombies. Who will win?
  4. Positive gaming news
  5. April Fool’s Day in Guild Wars
  6. Results of last week’s contest
  7. Win 4 boxes of Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition!!

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Larry is back!

I didn’t play Leisure Suit Larry: Magna Cum Laude (2004), although I wanted to. I actually had a copy sitting around but was too busy to play.

Now I don’t know where it’s gone, and its sequel, Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust, is here, after five long years.

Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust

Well, sort of here, anyway. The last I heard, it’s now sitting in someone’s office in MDA waiting to be rated before it can be released in Singapore.

This sequel continues the adventures of Larry Lovage, nephew to the original Larry Laffer in the earlier Larry games.

Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust

I tried a bit of the early games (those created by Al Lowe) and liked the humour and sarcasm and the problem-solving.

I don’t know how this new release will measure up. There were mixed reviews on Magna Cum Laude, with critics complaining that it’s not the same without Al Lowe’s touch. The gameplay was apparently slightly modified to keep up with the changing face of video games.

Of course there were also those who liked it, too. So, it’s always best to play the game and judge for yourself, you think?

Well, it’s any time soon. I hope it’s good. Will let you know if I get a copy of the game.

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Time Wasters by Swordplay

Swordplay is my pesky li’l bro who spends all his time playing time-wasting games. To make him a little bit more useful, I’m sitting on him and making him recommend one fun and simple web-based game each week.

Today’s recommendation:


Tontie

This is the well-loved Flash version of the well-loved classic Whac-A-Mole arcade game. You know, little critters pop out of holes? Whack ’em with hammer fast as you can?

Tontie is that, and harder. A lot harder.

Accompanied by a chirpy soundtrack reminiscent of cheesy Japanese game shows, Tontie is simple and addictive, and infuriating at higher levels.

Each level introduces a new critter which requires different handling. Some of them you have to hit twice, some you can’t hit without losing life, some you can only hit when the conditions are right, and so on.

Tontie

You have to memorise the conditions for every monster because, by level 20, you’ll be getting 20 different kinds of monsters popping out at random, very fast, like at the speed of light or close. As you progress, you can buy weapon upgrades and extra life to help you conquer the game.

So many years after release, Tontie is still widely played and Swordplay goes nuts over it. Apparently, he cried out in agony when he accidentally downgraded his weapon to a red hammer with a click, right after parting with his life savings for a gold hammer.

Tontie

Can’t say I blame him. I would too, probably worse. In fact, I haven’t even reached the stage where I have enough money to buy a gold hammer.

Well, this game is very good for taking a quick break and refreshing your energy between work or study. Just be careful not to get addicted!

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Plants vs. zombies. Who will win?

I don’t know how Swordplay does it, but he has a knack for finding rubbishly cute stuff on the Internet.

His latest find: An MTV for a B-grade zombie game that will be released on May 5, 2009, by PopCap.

Okay, it’s not really a zombie game in the usual sense of the genre. Plants vs Zombies is advertised as a tower defense game. I think you’re supposed to use a bunch of cute assorted plants to repel zombie invaders.

Plants vs Zombies

The MTV is cute and funny and catchy. Have a watch. I LOL’ed at the opening sequence because it was so unexpected and comical.

Swordplay also did some detective work and turned up the identity of the singer behind the MTV: A pretty Japanese lady by the name of Laura Shigihara.

Laura Shigihara

Okay, I don’t know if she’s actually Japanese. At least half, I guess. She was educated in the USA, so she could be an American Japanese or Japanese American, or something in between.

What’s important, though, is that she’s got a super cute voice and she’s pretty and she writes and performs videogame music for a living!

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Positive gaming news

After months of bad press on gaming, we finally see some good news articles that should give you some ammo against critics of your lifestyle.

Shooter video games ‘sharpen vision’

FPS games have been found to improve an aspect of our vision known as contrast sensitivity. Yes, playing FPS can indeed train our vision with long-term benefits! I celebrated this discovery by playing Left 4 Dead on the Xbox 360 last night. Not only do I think it’s good for the eyes, I think shooting zombies is good for the soul, too!

Study: Violent games least likely to cause gamer aggression

A study has shown that, out of three different kinds of games, violent games were the least likely to cause aggressive behaviour. The test was done on the Xbox 360, using an FPS, a racing game and a 3D tennis game. It was found that the racing game caused the most agitation and agression among the gamers.

Hey, next time anyone’s doing any tests involving gaming, invite me! Any excuse to play games, you know? ;)

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April Fool’s Day in Guild Wars

Most MMORPGs feature “live” events to commemorate special days, such as Valentine’s Day and Christmas. You’d get limited edition items and fun themed quests. If you’re enterprising, you’d also get to make a fast buck by stocking up on those limited items and selling them after the event is over.

But I never saw a game commemorate April Fool’s Day until Guild Wars.

In the last two years, the game brought joy and laughter to players by turning them into funny things on April 1st.

Last year, everyone got turned into stick men.

Guild Wars

This year, we all got turned into Gwen-chan. It was very well-received.

Guild Wars

Gwen is an important NPC whom everyone loves because she features very largely in the game’s storyline. She normally looks like this:

Guild Wars

Anyway, there was some kind of glitch where newly-created characters didn’t get turned into Gwen-chan, and that led to a lot of hilarious roleplaying among gamers.

Whereever there was a normal player, a huge school of Gwen-chans would surround him or her.

Guild Wars

Players spoke in baby talk and pretended that the normal players were parents.

By unspoken agreement, the normal players would dance and all the Gwen-chans would crowd around and watch, and make inane, kiddy comments.

Guild Wars

Overheard: “Why are we all gathered around the naked lady?”

Guild Wars

Overheard: “DAAAAAAAAAADDY!!!!”

At one point when everyone was crowding around two “daddies” and feeling deprived of maternal care, someone suddenly shouted: “There’s a mommy by the storage!!” (storage = bank)

Guild Wars

A few Gwen-chans rushed over to the storage and started MOMMMMMMMYing the mommy, but I think she was AFK or busy sorting her inventory or something and didn’t respond.

After a while, one of the Gwen-chans complained, “YOU SAD EXCUSE FOR A MOMMY!”

Guild Wars

And: “Daddy are you AFK??????”

LOL.

This one’s a good mommy:

Guild Wars

And good daddies:

Guild Wars

Guild Wars

This is me attempting to pull Swordplay’s hair:

Guild Wars

Haha, yes. Swordplay is the one kneeling on the floor.

I logged in the game but didn’t play (in the sense of adventuring and questing). After participating in the cutesy roleplay for half an hour or so, I basically just left my avatar there and, while doing other stuff on my computer, occasionally checked in to read the chat and laugh.

It was a total riot. I’m already looking forward to next year’s April Fool’s Day! Um, that is, I hope I’ll still be playing Guild Wars by then.

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Results of last week’s contest

Ahtiong is a lucky boy! He is about to win yet another GGF prize. This is his fourth time in five months! How cool is that? This week, he wins for himself a copy of Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition!!

Congratulations, ahtiong! I will contact you this time I since I already have your contact info, several times over. *lol*

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Win Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition!!

So, what’s the matter, huh? You people tired of getting free stuff, or was last week’s contest too difficult?

I still have four copies of this to give away.

Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition

Fine, I’ll make it easier this time. Just answer these two questions if you want a copy!

1. At the German Games Convention 2008, 16% of participants said they’d had a game account stolen by hackers.

a) No way!

b) True.

2. What exactly is Gamer Mode in Norton AntiVirus Gaming Edition?

a) The opposite of a younger brother: Won’t bother you while you’re in the middle of a game, but keeps you protected throughout.

b) Something that automatically suspends updates, alerts, and other background activities when the system goes into full screen mode.

c) All of the above.

Closing Date: April 9, 2009, 11:59 pm.

Find out more about Norton Antivirus Gaming Edition here.

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I’ve been wondering whether I should spread GGF out and, like, publish one small entry a day, rather than compile everything at the end of each week.

It would probably be easier for you as a reader and for me as a writer, no? The only problem would be that the name Gamer Girl Friday would become a misnomer.

What think you?

[Gamer Girl Friday]

GGF#42: Everyone has slitty eyes in Chinatown Wars

[Gamer Girl Friday]

The game of the week is Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars. I was quite surprised to see poster ads of the game at various bus-stops in Singapore.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

This is the first time I’ve seen ads for a DS game in Singapore. So it must be quite something, huh?

Maybe it’s because the game features a Chinese main cast and all the characters in the game have slitty eyes. And Singapore, as everyone knows, is in China.

Not.

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Table of Contents

  1. GTA: Chinatown Wars first impressions
  2. Time Wasters by Swordplay
  3. Singapore’s Biggest Halo Fan (video)
  4. Funny quests in Guild Wars
  5. Results of last week’s contest
  6. Win 5 boxes of Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition!!

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GTA: Chinatown Wars first impressions

I’m happy to get a new game for my Nintendo DS. I’m tired of playing Puzzle Quest on it. (Playing Puzzle Quest on the Xbox 360 is a lot cooler.)

So, Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars shall be my new MRT companion for the next few months. Yeah, it’s probably gonna take me at least that long to complete the game because I don’t take the MRT a lot, these days.

First impressions of the game: Excellent.

Everything you love about Grand Theft Auto is there. Well, except for a few little things, such as graphics. But this is a DS game, so if anyone wants to complain about the graphics, I will shoot him in the legs and run him over with my Rhino.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

Yes, you can buy all kinds of funny vehicles in GTACW.

Even a hearse. LOLOLOL.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

And a go-kart.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

A bulldozer!! Hahahaha.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

I’m sorry. I just find this very funny.

Of course, there are tons of speed demons you can buy, too.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

Unfortunately, I’m only 3.6% into the game right now and can’t afford to buy anything. I have, like, $350. Most of the vehicles are still locked at this point, anyway.

In any case, the GTA series started off as having crappy graphics in the first place, so this DS instalment is no major infraction against the franchise.

It takes a bit of getting used to the top-down view, though, if you’ve been spoilt by the next-gen versions which last stopped at GTA4.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

But the gameplay is as top-notch as you could want.

As in GTA4, you start off as an out-of-towner brought to Liberty City by fate. There, you unwittingly get entangled in a life of crime. Before long, you start to lose all morals because its so easy to steal cars, kill people and make a fortune being a criminal.

All the usual GTA goodness.

In Chinatown Wars, you play Huang Lee, a Chinese dude possessing the Western stereotype of Asians with slitty eyes and a funny forehead, but speaks with Western wit and sarcasm.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

Most of the time, you use the D-pad to move around and fight people. Occsasionally, you get to enjoy the touch-screen capabilities of the DS.

For example, jacking a car requires you to poke at your screen to hotwire it.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

To progress missions, you’ll sometimes be required to use your stylus (or your nails, if you have very sharp, pointy ones). One of the first things you’ll get to do, for example, is tap at a car windscreen to smash the glass and make an escape.

All that is rather cool. Who doesn’t love touch-screen? But I do find it mildly annoying having to pick up and put down my stylus repeatedly over the course of a game. (GTA games require a lot of coordination to drive vehicles or fight — there are even combos moves for combat — so it’s better to put the stylus down altogether when you don’t need it.

What’s great about GTACW, compared to other GTA games, is that you can teleport to a location if you’re doing a mission for the second time. That means, if you fail a mission and want to redo it, you can skip the cutscene and the travelling, and zip to the needed location instantly.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

That saves a lot of time.

Oh, another thing different. When you get cops on your tail, you can lose your wanted level by ramming into police cars or forcing them to crash themselves, effectively taking them out of the picture so that there’s no one left to chase you. Then you’re off the radar.

Well, I can’t say a lot more about the game since I’ve only spent maybe two hours on it. Reading some of the reviews out there, there’s a lot more fun stuff I haven’t uncovereed. But what I’ve seen so far is already good enough to keep me going.

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Time Wasters by Swordplay

Swordplay is my pesky li’l bro who spends all his time playing time-wasting games. To make him a little bit more useful, I’m sitting on him and making him find and recommend one fun and simple web-based game each week.

Today’s recommendation:

Cursor Chaos

Here’s a schizophrenic little game that will give you a few minutes of insane entertainment… if you’re good.

If you’re clueless, you’ll die within 42 seconds.

In Cursor Chaos, you’re given a series of simple tasks to do using only the four arrow keys and spacebar. You have to complete the task within about six seconds (which includes the time you need to spend figuring out what you need to do to complete the task).

If you fail, you lose one life. You have seven lives to get through 42 levels.

Cursor Chaos

If you die prematurely, you get insulted by the game.

Cursor Chaos

Haha.

My best score for now is 459. Can you beat my time? (Lower score = better.)

Cursor Chaos

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Singapore’s Biggest Halo Fan (video)

Here’s the video I said I would make a month ago. =P The finals of the Singapore’s Biggest Halo Fan competition. See what each of the five finalists did to convince us that they’re the biggest Halo fan in Singapore!

I thought they were all equally impressive but, as in all competitions, there can only be one winner, so.

Click here
for more photos.

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Funny quests in Guild Wars

I’m really surprised at how good Guild Wars is. I was never so impressed when playing the beta in 2003.

What I like most is the rich story and the way the game makes you feel part of it. At strategic points of main quests, you’ll get cutscenes in which you’re the leading character.

Guild Wars

Guild Wars

Whatever your character is wearing (or not wearing) at that moment is reflected in the cutscene, giving you a real sense of belonging in the story. If you’re grouped up with friends, you’ll see your friends in the cutscene, too.

The quests and dialogues in this game are actually worth the time reading. In fact, no other game has actually made me feel something for the NPCs and want to find out what happens to them next.

I also love the humour.

There’s this quest where I was supposed to help a city officer dispatch aid to homeless villagers.

Guild Wars

He gave me a bunch of mirrors and made me look for three homeless villagers to give them to.

My first beneficiary wasn’t too grateful.

Guild Wars

LOLOL. Ultimate funny.

The second villager said:

Guild Wars

And the third:

“I appreciate you delivering this, but can you not see we have no need for such things? All of us have basically given up on the ministry when it comes to matters of survival. Thankfully, the emperor is much more attuned to the people and manages to provide for us.”

That’s not the end of it.

I went back to the officer to report my mission and he said:

Guild Wars

Haha!

I love Guild Wars!

Guild Wars

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Results of last week’s contest

I guess the haiku contest was a little too tough. Only one person managed to do it correctly so, like, I didn’t have to do any judging~!!

Thanks, RN1209, for doing it correctly, and writing a pretty witty one, too. As a reward, you get an Xbox 360 laser pointer LED light keyring! Congratulations!

Xbox 360 laser pointer LED light keyring

Here’s the winning entry:

No loot, you say, girl?
I suppose that’s no surprise…
Sneaky you are, yes?;)

— RN1209

I’m overlooking the smiley. And the dig. Cos it’s kinda funny. lol.

Please e-mail me about your prize! Thanks!

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Win Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition!!

WOAH WOAH WOAH!

I have FIVE boxes of Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition to give away to five savvy gamers, courtesy of Symantec!

Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition

From protecting gold earned in MMORPGs to keeping malware at bay, Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition is designed specifically for gaming. It’s fast and light on system resources, and never compromises the gaming experience.

How cool is that? An anti-virus software made specially for us! Each box has a commercial value of S$65, which is quite a reasonable price for one year’s worth of protection.

Norton AntiVirus 2009 Gaming Edition

But, hey, you don’t have to pay even that because we’re giving it to you free! If you pass the tests, that is.

FIRST TEST

Answer the following questions correctly.

1. At the German Games Convention 2008, 16% of participants said they’d had a game account stolen by hackers.

a) No way!

b) True.

2. What exactly is Gamer Mode in Norton AntiVirus Gaming Edition?

a) The opposite of a younger brother: Won’t bother you while you’re in the middle of a game, but keeps you protected throughout.

b) Something that automatically suspends updates, alerts, and other background activities when the system goes into full screen mode.

c) All of the above.

3. What did I give the homeless villagers?

a) Mirrors.

b) Tin cans.

c) Food.

SECOND TEST

Prove that you’re a gamer.

I don’t care how you do it. Use words, text, image, video, sound or whatever you can think of. I’m quite flexible. Just do it!

THIRD TEST

Post all your answers here by April 2, 2009, 11:59 pm.

Five winners will be picked and announced next Friday. Good luck!

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YAy! It’s done!

[Gamer Girl Friday]

GGF#41: Games for bored and busy people

[Gamer Girl Friday]

This week is Silly Mindless Games Week. Let’s devote half an hour each day to playing mindless, stress-relieving games, because your brain needs it.

Gamer Girl Friday recommends a few bite-size games for taking a quick break between work or studying.

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Table of Contents

  1. Kingdom of Loathing
  2. Time Wasters by Swordplay
  3. Blockbuster arcade games
  4. iPhone: True or False
  5. Guild Wars avatars are so sexy
  6. The five-word story
  7. Results of last week’s contest
  8. Win an Xbox 360 laser pointer LED keyring!!

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Kingdom of Loathing

If you’ve ever needed a short distraction, if you’ve ever felt bored, if you’ve ever needed to kill 30 minutes of time, I have one excellent recommendation:

Kingdom of Loathing

This is a comical web-based role-playing game where you do regular RPG stuff, like questing or killing mobs. Except that, in the game, you get only 40 turns a day.

That means you can’t get addicted to it. Once you’ve used up your number of turns, you can’t play anymore. You can still perform certain actions, but you can’t do anything significant until your turns get refreshed the next day.

Kingdom of Loathing

It’s perfect for casual gamers who want something fun to do for a while but don’t want games to control their lives.

But that’s not the best thing about this game. The best thing is that it’s very funny. The developers have an awesome sense of humour and they’re not afraid to exploit the heck out of it.

Kingdom of Loathing
Seen inside the Haiku Dungeon.

The illustrations are childish scrawls, which makes it very funny when coupled with sophisticated (although you might argue corny) humour.

For instance, as with all RPGs, you get to choose a class of character out of six possible classes. Some examples:

Kingdom of Loathing

The class types are all pretty funny.

During your adventures, you will pick up cool items to help you out.

Kingdom of Loathing

Kingdom of Loathing

To earn these items, you’ll have to battle unimaginable horrors.

Kingdom of Loathing

I’m a playing a Sauceror, you see. And my default weapon is a saucepan.

This game isn’t just about fighting monsters, either. You will often bump into random adventures that make you choose a path:

Kingdom of Loathing

You will visit dangerous zones such as:

Kingdom of Loathing

And you get to bring a pet to help you fight evil monsters.

Kingdom of Loathing

Pooka is my pet. (You can name your pet anything you want.)

You will level up and get stronger.

Kingdom of Loathing

Once in a while, Monty Python fans will thrill to references to The Holy Grail, scattered around the game.

Kingdom of Loathing

To any passer-by who sees you playing this game, you will look like a complete idiot.

But it will be worth it.

I actually played this game years ago. I can’t remember how many years. The game’s been around for a while. But I stopped playing for a reason I can’t remember and my account has gotten deleted since.

A few days ago, I suddenly remembered this game again so I made a new account and now I’m having as much fun with it as I had, years ago.

Well, give Kingdom of Loathing a try. It’s free and it’s entertaining and it’s addictive. Just that it won’t allow you to get addicted.

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Time Wasters by Swordplay

Swordplay is my pesky li’l bro who spends all his time playing time-wasting games. To make him a little bit more useful, I’m sitting on him and making him recommend one fun and simple web-based game each week.

Today, Swordplay recommends…

Don't Look Back

Don’t Look Back is a simple flash game with a deep storyline, although you will only get it upon completion of the game.

It’s a challenging action-platformer using minimalist graphics and will take only maybe 30 minutes to complete.

Don't Look Back

Some of the bosses can be quite tough but it doesn’t matter because you don’t perma-die in this game. If you get killed, you start over in the same place you got killed. No replaying stages!

If you have to take a break or close your browser suddenly, the game will remember where you last stopped and put you back a few frames before that.

You need some patience to get through some of the challenges but it feels great when you do!

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Blockbuster arcade games

If you’ve got an Xbox 360, rejoice!

The Days of Arcade campaign was launched two days ago, bringing you six weeks of blockbuster arcade titles that will make you drool.

This week, the campaign launches with Hasbro Family Game Night, which is a super-value-for-money package because it has many games in one!

Hasbro Family Game Night

Featuring favourite Hasbro games such as Connect 4, Battleship and Sorry! Sliders!, you can play the classic versions of the games or enjoy the revamped versions.

Note that you need to be signed up with Xbox LIVE to download this game. But Xbox LIVE is free to sign up, so that’s alright!

To find out what other titles are coming on Days of Arcade, click here.

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iPhone: True or False

For six months, since I bought my iPhone, there hasn’t been a single game in it. I never really believed in playing games on mobile phones.

When I have time to kill outside, I’m either playing on my DS or reading a book.

But last week, horror of horrors, I forgot to bring out my DS and my book! So I was stuck outside with nothing to do but surf the net on my phone. Which gets old because I’m not really into random net-surfing.

That led me to changing my attitude towards mobile phone gaming. Now I need games on my iPhone for future times of forgetfulness.

One of the notable games I found was True or False Trivia. It’s not exactly a game; more a quiz application.

True or False Trivia

You get hundreds of weird facts for which you have to guess “true” or “false”. I learnt many interesting things through this. For example:

The average office desk has 400 times more bacteria than a toilet.

Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

Every time you sneeze, some of your brain cells die.

Interesting, no?

There’s a free version of this application, which gives you 110 questions. The paid version (USD1.99) gives you a lot more but I don’t know how much because I haven’t bought it yet.

lol.

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Guild Wars avatars are so sexy

Still playing Guild Wars.

I created a new character this week. A ranger. Because Kerrendor has a masterplan for us to play the ranger team build, which means an entire party made up of only rangers and their pets.

Eight rangers + eight pets = massive damage.

Guild Wars ranger

Guild Wars ranger

I took the longest time to decide which hairstyle to choose (see above). I’m such a bimbo. Sometimes, I spend up to an hour just customising a character, especially for those games with fully-customisable facial features.

I finally went with the second one because I like the leaf in the hair.

Guild Wars ranger

And the twin pigtails.

Guild Wars ranger

Guild Wars ranger

The game world is really beautiful and the quests can be quite creative and entertaining. Best thing is that it’s not as demanding as other games of its genre. I can actually do something worthwhile in just half an hour.

I guess I’ll be playing Guild Wars for a while.

Guild Wars ranger
My pet tiger.

Guild Wars
A lopsided zone.

Guild Wars
Surrounded by a necromancer’s pets.

I think my elementalist is cuter.

Guild Wars

But I don’t have time to play so many characters!

The ranger team build had better be worth it! =P

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The five-word story

As part of last week’s contest, contestants had to collectively tell a story, with each contribution limited to five words.

I’ve put together the story in full for your reading pleasure. (Assuming you can even make sense of it.)

(Typos have been corrected, punctuation added and tenses standardised. Other than that, the content is verbatim.)

Zombicidal Maniacs

Authors: Lindy, Ben!, Yoi, ahtiong, Aicee, terboo, nigel, quar, Jerry, Sn, Peaches Mode, RN1209, amd

One day, in the village, there were zombies running amok, causing the villagers to flee. And the local priest started praying to the gods for holy lightning, thunder and fart.

Zombies also began to pray to Sheylara, their goth goddess, for some juicy human flesh and lots of chilli sauce.

Packets of Mac chilli appeared, but some wanted ketchup, instead, so they fought among themselves. Soon, three police cars arrived. Two female zombies stepped out and the zombies stopped fighting.

And the zombie king appeared in his diapers and pyjamas, carrying a banana and a bottle of milk for zombies, from the mammary glands of zombie cow across the street, where Yoi lived.

Then, Yoi whipped out his miniguns and shot RN. RN evaded, then fell into a drain nearby where he twitched in pain, scrambling to find his intestines because he wanted to eat Peaches’ pink shirt for dinner. (Kajang satay with soy sauce.)

Soon, the zombies started puking out RN’s intestines. After that, it was Peaches’ pink shirt’s turn. Amd saw RN eating cow dung with dog piss but remembered his intestine was still in the zombie’s puke.

Then he thought, “I need to kill Peaches and Yoi.”

But, suddenly, Yoi unleashed his zombie doggies from Resident Evil and quickly sent them to find Sheylara, who’s in Kuching, bishing Yoi through her iPhone.

Soon, Peaches Mode also appeared aristocratically from the horizon. Then RN bushed ALL. So there.

He was bushing everyone. Then PeachMeister showed up. Ruined everything by bravely shielding the innocent.

“No innocents here. All guilty,” he said.

Then RN quickly went to the law firm to get Justice CG to help RN bush everyone again.

While both bushed, Yoi began to disintegrate, discombobulate and metamorphose because he had diarrhea. So amd recommended him charcoal pills to ease the diarrhea, but that’s not how diarrhoea’s spelt.

“That’s correct,” Peachy pointed out and so the madness continued… or so we thought.

Once…

Well.

The story started to not make sense after around Peaches’ pink shirt. So I have no idea how you guys are going to continue the madness.

But knock yourselves out and thanks to all contributors!

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Results of last week’s contest

And the winner of this awesome Xbox 360 laser pointer LED light keyring is…

Xbox 360 laser pointer LED light keyring

Nigel!

Congratulations, Nigel! I will contact you by e-mail regarding your prize if I can remember to. Alternatively, you can e-mail me, which would be a lot faster!

Now, wasn’t that fun?

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Win an Xbox 360 laser pointer LED keyring!!

Wow. Guess what.

Déjà vu!

I have another Xbox 360 laser pointer LED keyring to give away! So, if you really want one of these and you’re not Nigel, here’s another chance for you!

Alright. You need to do some work for this. I would like for you guys to write a haiku-style verse! Yarrhh!

Haiku is a form of Japanese poetry consisting of three lines, the most common of which comes in the pattern of 5-7-5.

First line: 5 syllables
Second line: 7 syllables
Third line: 5 syllables.

Example:

I am a contest
attracting lots of people
because I am leet

Your Mission
Write a piece of haiku about me in the 5-7-5 format. You don’t have to use my name but you can if you want to.

Judging Criteria
LOL Factor – 50%
Poetic Quality – 30%
Creativity – 20%

Closing Date
March 26, 2009, 11:59 pm.

You may submit up to two entries each. May the best entry win!

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You have reached the end;
Congratulations, gamer,
but there is no loot.

[Gamer Girl Friday]

GGF#39: Xbox Taiwan interviews Sheylara

[Gamer Girl Friday]

In view of publishing this issue as soon as possible, I am not going to make a speech here today. On with the goods!

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Table of Contents

  1. Xbox Taiwan interviews Sheylara
  2. Ninja Blade short review
  3. Resident Evil 5 special edition bundle
  4. The biggest Halo fan in Singapore…
  5. Why I’m playing Guild Wars now
  6. Win a Street Fighter IV calendar!!

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Xbox Taiwan interviews Sheylara

Yesterday, I had my first interview done on Xbox LIVE, through Xbox LIVE video chat.

It was conducted by Toshi, a prominent Taiwanese blogger who is also the voice of Xbox Taiwan and maintains the local official site, Xbox Life.

The interview was recorded and a video of it will be published on the site once they’re done editing and subtitling it.

It was really fun! I haven’t actually tried the video chat function on Xbox LIVE before, so it was interesting. Well, it’s just like any other video conference. You stick a webcam in front of you and you see two faces on the screen – yours and your chat partner’s.

I forgot to take a screenshot, sorry!

Anyway, Toshi posted a teaser for the interview a few days ago.

The translation (kindly supplied by Xbox Singapore’s PR agency):

A Mysterious Babe will be making a special appearance on Xbox LIFE!

Why is she standing with Master Chief? Who is she?? Don’t tell me Master Chief’s real identity is???

Since there are so many unanswered questions, we are going to have a private chat with her to find out more. Let’s call her Secret Agent S for now. We’ll have our first interaction with her this coming Thursday on Feb 26. All the details will be disclosed on Xbox LIFE (blog). Watch this space if you’re keen to know her better!

Hehe! Cute! Link here. Will update you guys when the video is up!

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Ninja Blade short review

I meant to do this two weeks ago! But I’ve been so caught up I haven’t had time to edit this video until today:

It’s a montage of the first hour of gameplay. I’ve only managed to clear the first mission of the game and it’s already as exciting as hookey.

There are, no doubt, some Ninja Gaiden II elements in it, such as the awesome ninja leaps and bounds and cool weaponry, and critics might brush Ninja Blade off as a copy. But it’s a ninja game, for crying out loud. How else would you make a ninja game if not with the obligatory ninja wayang?

But the gameplay experience is quite unique.

First of all, the game is very, very cinematic. The whole damn thing feels like a big-budget Hollywood film. Watch the video and you’ll understand. Awe-inspiring cinematic angles, stylistic panning, fluid transitions between cut-scenes and gameplay, slow-mo effects during critical strike moments, sometimes humorous dialogue.

When I was viewing my video clips for editing, I wanted to ditch the videos and go power up my Xbox 360 right away. This is one of those games you’ll enjoy watching someone else play, even.

There was this part when I was learning how to run on walls and, as usual, failing very miserably in my first attempts. The failure made me fall onto a lower level of the map, which led me to discovering a secret breakable wall.

Breaking through, I found special items, including a new ninja costume! It pays to explore every nook and cranny.

Original costume:

Looted costume:

LOL pinstripe ninja! That’s quite a silly costume, to be sure. But there’ll be more styles. I just haven’t found them yet.

You can also customise the colours of every part of your costume, right down to the last detail.

You could make a total clown out of your ninja if you wanted to. Once you’ve saved your costume, you’ll see your exact creation in the next missions, including in the cut-scenes. Pretty cool, huh?

There’s one interesting feature in the game which starts out as fun but becomes annoying after a while.

At crucial points of the plot, sometimes you’re tasked to press a specific button on your controller to progress the story. You have like less than two seconds to react. You get to retry it if you fail (there’s a cool rewind sequence) but you take damage if you fail these things during boss fights.

You’d have to memorise your button positions because there is not enough time to look at your controller to find the button.

But despite it being mildly annoying at times, I really enjoy the cinematics of this part of the gameplay. Again, watch the video!

Finally, one super annoying thing about Ninja Blade: You can’t save between missions!!

Your game only saves when you complete a mission. The first mission took me an hour to complete. Go figure.

You could complete it in less than an hour, I suppose, but probably not a lot less. I think games should let us save at least every 15 minutes, if not 10.

So, if you want to play this game, wait till you have plenty of time.

Newbie tip from Cavin of Xbox Xperience Zone (Funan): Your ninja has three weapons which you can upgrade using blood crystals. Don’t upgrade the Oni-Slayer Blade because you get a free upgrade on that weapon a little later in the game.

Cavin, by the way, has completed the entire game several times (because he demos games at XXZ and just spends all his days playing games – what a cool job!).

He told me the tip after I’d already upgraded my slayer. Doh. So I’m probably gonna replay the game from scratch when I pick it up again. Which is no biggie. I rather enjoyed it.

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Resident Evil 5 special edition bundle

The much anticipated Resident Evil 5 now comes as part of an Xbox 360 deal that will blow you fans away!

For just S$590, receive this whole bundle of goodies!

  • Xbox 360 console
  • Resident Evil 5 game
  • Matching wireless controller
  • Wired headset
  • Exclusive premium Resident Evil 5 theme for Xbox LIVE
  • Resident Evil 5 Making-Of DVD
  • 3-month Xbox LIVE Gold subscription card
  • Exclusive tin case
  • Bonus card to download Super Street Fighter II Turbo HD Remix

Whee! All the better to prepare your battle against the zombies!

The Resident Evil 5 special edition bundle is only available while stocks last.

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The biggest Halo fan in Singapore…

…will be revealed tomorrow!!

The Xbox Team recently hosted a competition to seek the biggest Halo fan in Singapore. Participants were tasked to submit as much photo and video evidence as possible of their Halo fanaticism. We now have five finalists competing for the title.

And these five will be put to the test tomorrow at Xbox Xperience Zone (Challenger, Funan) from 5 pm to 7 pm.

This competition is held in conjunction with the launch of Halo Wars, which is currently hogging the limelight within the Xbox community. (I have the game… I just haven’t had time to play it. =P)

Expect mini contests, giveaways and photo-taking opportunities with Master Chief at the event tomorrow! (If you’re among the first 50 to take a photo with him, you get a print-out to take home with you, free!

Here’s the Master Chief photo again…

Anyway, I hope to see you at Funan tomorrow. I’ll be there!

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Why I’m playing Guild Wars now

I can’t quite believe that I’m actually spending hours of my precious days on this game. It’s quite an old game, around since 2005, but is still going strong in terms of player base.

One day, out of the blue, my friends all decided to troop down to Sim Lim Square together to buy Guild Wars. And suddenly, the whole group is playing.

These are the same friends (Club Morte) whom I met in EverQuest II in 2005. It was through an MMORPG that we bonded, although we’ve stopped playing MMOs for a few years now, so it’s quite nostalgic to explore another MMO together after so many years.

The good thing about Guild Wars is that you only pay a one-time fee to buy the game. There is no monthly subscription fee for logging into the game.

Okay, another good thing: The graphics and and avatars are beautiful!! This is my character wearing Xbox colours, hah! =)

I’m an Elementalist. I chose this class because the armor is very cute! Even the combat stances are cute! *lol*

I actually played Guild Wars beta in 2004, but never felt compelled to play the game at retail. I don’t remember why. Most probably, I was busy with another MMO at that time.

So, I’m quite enjoying this game right now, especially because my friends are playing.

Morte’s character’s name is Emperor Morte. He’s been receiving a lot of flak from us for that, over the past week.

Every hour, the game will remind you how long you’ve been playing.

Oops!

My next armor upgrade:

Some people have mini pets which do nothing in the game except follow them around and strike cute poses. Some of these pets are humanoids and it’s really funny seeing them walk around the city.

Hehe!! My gaming bro Swordplay, who is a long-time GW player, loaned me a candy stick and gingerbread man weapon set. It was a limited edition Christmas release.

The stats are low, but just nice for my level right now.

Casting a spell:

Back view of see-through armor. *lol*

Pity that party sizes are limited to four per group. A major bummer!

Well, we’ll see how it goes. I’m enjoying it so far and, perhaps, the game will even last a few months for us, at least.

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Win a Street Fighter IV calendar!!

The Street Fighter IV calendar redemption program at Xbox Xperience Zone is winding to a close today.

If you didn’t get your calendar, you could try winning one of the two sets I have on hand right now!

I actually have three, but the Goonfather confiscated one to place in his office. But that’s okay. He’s the biggest Street Fighter fan there ever was. He told me he practically lived in the arcade during his youth.

So, how about I give my other two sets to two worthy Street Fighter fans? Tell me:

  1. Who’s your favourite Street Fighter character and why.
  2. Who’s your least favourite Street Fighter character and why.

I’m looking for entertaining answers (can be short and sweet), but you’re welcome to give me straight answers as well. If there aren’t any entries that jump out and grab me, I’ll randomise the winners.

Closing date: Thursday, March 5, 2009, 11:59 pm.

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I am currently playing: Guild Wars, Puzzle Quest, Grand Theft Auto IV, Funtown Mahjong…

You know what, scratch that.

I am currently playing: A heap of games.

So it is with a lot of effort that I pry myself from my games to fulfill all my responsibilities daily, including publishing Gamer Girl Friday.

If GGF is late or absent sometimes, you gotta understand. I’m Gamer Girl Friday, not Writer Girl Friday! =P

[Gamer Girl Friday]