Conversations with the Goonfather

Once again, for those who are new to my blog, the Goonfather is not my father. He’s my goon partner.

He always makes silly remarks and tries to trick, manipulate, con, insult, tease, confuse and annoy people with his words because it’s a great source of entertainment for him.

Sometimes it backfires.

I was having a conversation in the car with him about Christmas and my impending trip to Korea (which is happening before Christmas). I kinda got excited over the thought of shopping for Christmas presents in Korea.

The Goonfather got excited, too.

“Yay!” he said, “You can buy my birthday present also!”

“What do you want?”

“Oooh,” said the Goonfather, excitedly. “I want… I want… Korean porn!”

“WTF,” I said. “You want me to get caught at customs??”

Then, I had a thought. “I know! I will snail mail it to you! If anyone’s gonna get caught, it will be you!”

So he changed his mind.

“No, no,” he said. “I don’t want porn. I want a live Korean girl.”

I had another idea.

“How about I buy nice Korean clothes there, then come back and cosplay a Korean girl for you, ok?”

“Yaaaaay!” he said. “Ok! My own Korean cutie!”

“That’s your birthday present!!” I announced happily.

“Ehhh…,” he said. “I think I kena con.”

(“Kena” is a Malay word meaning to get/receive a negative action.)

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Yesterday. We were at the Singapore Indoor Stadium watching the Singapore Slingers duke it out with the Brisbane Bullets.

During a time-out, Michael Wong, one of the only two Singaporean players in the Singapore team, got called into the game.

Which prompted frenzied cheering in the audience because he hardly ever gets to play.

I was busy taking photographs, so I didn’t catch what was happening.

So I asked the Goonfather, “Who did Michael Wong replace?”

He pointed at the Slingers bench.

“There, that tall one.”

I gave him a narrow eye and then informed him, “THEY ARE ALL TALL LOR!!”

“Oh,” he said.

His answers are always rubbish.

By the way, it was a great match. I must be pretty lucky, because the Slingers have only won three out of 17 games and I witnessed two of those wins! The Slingers played so amazingly yesterday, my jaw was left hanging quite a bit.

Thanks again to Nicholas and Precious for the corporate box tickets!

Slinger Girls giving away an LCD TV to a lucky draw winner.

Someone has been really busy during the match…

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Anyway, I’m putting the Goonfather up for rental. Need to trick, manipulate, con, insult, tease, confuse or annoy a friend (or enemy)? Call 1800-GOON-A-FRIEND today!