absent minded

Help, I’m a scatterbrain

- Sheylara 19 Comments

I think I’m getting more stupid as I grow older.

I’ve been planning to design and print some personal name cards for some time now and finally got on my ass to do it. The print shop said to submit in PSD format and I can specify pantone colours if I want exact shades.

So, today, I went to the shop with my PSDs and a sheet of paper listing the pantones I used.

“Ok. Your PSD is unflattened, right?” said the guy when I handed him the stuff.

“Er… I flattened them,” I said, “You need them unflattened?”

“If you want me to pick the specific colours.”

OKWTF. How dumb can I get???? It’s not like I’m a newborn with no common sense. Walao.

I just never thought of it until he mentioned it.

I find myself getting more and more scatterbrained with each passing year. And my memory is dying on me.

HOW???

A few weeks ago, I was walking to my car after an audition. I held a file with one hand and a handbag with the other hand. When I got to the car, I had to make an urgent phone call, so I tried to multi-task.

I slung my handbag over my shoulder, placed the file on the roof of the car, used my right hand to unlock the car (wasn’t using remote control) while dialing the phone with my left hand.

While I talked on the phone, I got into the car, started the engine and closed the door.

AND THEN I DROVE OFF FORGETTING THAT MY FILE WAS STILL ON TOP OF THE CAR!!!

Walao for the nth time!!!!

I only realised it when I reached my destination, by which time the file had totally disappeared. I was searching for my file and couldn’t find it. It took me 20 minutes to realise what I had done.

Terrible right?!

That’s not the worst of it. I’m so forgetful that I can’t remember names and faces, which is like the number one sin on earth. I have on a few occasions tried to introduce myself to people I’ve already been introduced to briefly before. So embarrassing can?

I try very hard to remember, but when, let’s say, you’re at a networking party and you meet five different people every ten minutes, there’s not enough time to stick it into the memory.

And I totally have no short term memory to speak of.

My memory is so bad that driving is a stressful event. I can never remember how to get anywhere and I always get lost. Singapore roads are super confusing, especially one way streets.

Sometimes I prefer to take public transport even though I have a car available to use.

I’m such a dingbat.

(Actually, Nanny Wen is worse than me in this department, hahahaha, but I’m bad enough lah.)

I need some serious help. How can I regain my once normal memory? *sob*

More Nanny Wen

- Sheylara 5 Comments

Nanny Wen is famous in our small circle for her absent-mindedness.

She always forgets her handphone, wallet and keys, among other things. She leaves them at home, she leaves them at my place, she leaves them in the car.

She traps herself at home by leaving her keys elsewhere and waiting until everyone has gone out before deciding to go out herself, by which time she can’t because the gate’s locked and no one’s home to unlock it for her.

She’s at my place one day and rummaging frantically in her big-ass tote bag.

“QY!” she yells, “I can’t find my phone!! Help! Did you see my phone??”

I’m at my computer doing stuff and I tell her, like I’ve told her a zillion times before, that I don’t know where her phone is.

“Can you call me?” she says.

In our short two-year friendship, I’ve called her more times to help her locate her phone than to actually talk to her.

So I quick dial her line and her phone rings. Her phone, which is sitting just 10 centimetres away from where she’s rummaging her bag, rings.

“Oops!” she says, “My phone is here all along. Hahahaha.”

Just what do you do with a dingbat friend like that?