Autobiography of a bimbo

The following post first appeared on Sheylara.com on August 19, 2004.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

On Monday, I was recording my song when I accidentally kicked my computer.

It wasn’t a violent kick. More like a nudge, really.

Instantly, the computer shut itself down and there was this scary sizzling sound with occasional sparks, sounding like the sparklers children play with during Chinese New Year except much louder.

After 786 hours of very loud sizzling (actually it lasted only about a minute but it felt like a lifetime because I thought the PC was going to explode in my face), it suddenly stopped sizzling and then a smell of burning rubber wafted through the air.

My first reaction was: F**K.

You must excuse my extreme display of emotion because my PC is as precious to me as any of my bodily organs (except my appendix because everyone knows it’s redundant, but, even so, I would still prefer very much to have it intact in my body).

After calming myself down, I tried to boot the computer up again but it just refused to get turned on, no matter how I stroked it or whispered sweet nothings at it.

I thought maybe something had come loose, so I checked all the plugs connected to the back of the CPU. More coaxing didn’t yield favourable results. I thought for sure the machine had gone into early retirement by incinerating itself.

And the following minutes were, like: MY PC IS DEAD! NOOOOOoooooo~!

Being a computer hardware idiot, I didn’t have the inclination to perform an autopsy, preferring instead to rely on the experts.

So I called upon the mighty, fearsome Dragon, who claims to like eating women (possibly more than chicken), but who kindly agreed not to eat me if I promised to introduce him to Selina (of Taiwanese pop trio S.H.E.) when I become famous.

He very nicely agreed to fit me into his very busy schedule of chomping distressed damsels, despite not being able to eat me.

Mission: Ressurect Sheylara’s Comptuer was a total success!

Dragon discovered that the plug had come loose on this power regulator thing which I swear I didn’t even know existed (even though it was probably lying amidst the jungle of snaking cables next to the CPU).

Jungle of snaking cables

And, suddenly, this mysterious, ethereal voice spoke to me in a very melodramatic manner: “You have come of age, my child. Stand tall and bear your mark of pride well, for, truly, you are now a certified bimbo!”

Well, who cares, anyway.

My PC is not dead and I didn’t get eaten and I am back online! That’s all that matters.

What’s more, I found 10 cents while taking the picture above. Check out the left edge of the picture.

Here’s a closer look.

Egads! We're rich!

Blogging pays! Literally!

25 thoughts on “Autobiography of a bimbo

  1. Avatar

    I can understand your feelings when our PC give us a surprise by doing a sayonara. Other than my wife, my PC is the second most important “person” in my life. My family even call it my concubine. :P

    It so happens that my memory card reader suddenly fails for some reason last nite. I went ballistic for 5 mins n practice some “anger management” phrases I learn during N.S. I end up opening the casing n reinsert the reader cable and whoalah! The bugger works again.

    Whew…. that was a close one.

  2. Avatar

    I know !!!
    Once going 24 hours without my PC, life was a drag man….
    I was going nuts without it !!
    Now there are backup PC, backup notebook, backups of backups.

    btw, I think he means the power cable came loose ~
    And whoa ~ you need some cable management there ~

  3. Avatar

    @shey

    I understand how you feel when your computer went dead, it also happen to me once except that time my harddisk Mati.

    My sister mop the floor that day and knock my computer, the whole thing went dead with EMOS check Error.. After a few try i gave up and send it for repair .

    Finally after 1 months i got it back…. Well the process of frustration just started after i fitted the motherboard back, the Ram sloty actually also Mati!!!! Damn!!! That is enough!!!!!

    I gave the computer away to one of my best friend and went down SimLim SQ to buy all the new computer parts fix it up.

    I swear never again to send for service if my Motherboard ever give me problem cos it is just the begining.

  4. Avatar

    LOL! Bimbo-Wimbo. The Appendix is, i quote Dr. Douglas Theobald, “…a leading candidate for the worst designed organ in the human body. How nice if the appendix would just degenerate away after it is no longer needed, so it could never get infected and kill us needlessly. Any biological structure that supposedly ensures our livelihood by its functions, yet paradoxically and unnecessarily kills a large fraction of its bearers prematurely, is poorly designed indeed.”

    Another nerd attack; you’d be surprised if you know how long our blood vessels are if you lay them end to end.

  5. Avatar

    @Sheylara: How prophetic! Four years on, and yes, blogging DOES pay:) But I seriously hope that after all this time you’ve improved on the orderliness of the power cables, girl. I can’t even begin to describe the chaos going on there:) And how IS Dragon these days, anyway?

  6. Avatar

    I’m seriously impressed with the Medusa’s hair of wires. That manages to make MY attempts at twisting enough wires into a bundle to fill the world look amateur.
    Congrats!

  7. Avatar

    Ha ha….so funny…really finding money in that horrible jungle is an achievement!!!anyway, did you find it after taking that photo or before??

  8. Avatar

    tiger4: Haha… even if memory card reader spoil, at least better than whole PC spoil. :P I dropped my SD card reader once and it split open until can see the green colour chip inside.

    I thought can throw away already but then, just for fun, I tried to snap it back again, like playing Lego. And it actually still worked after that even though the USB head got bent.

    Relax: Never fail lah. One can’t be an expert at everything. :P

    SpiritAngelo: Haha, yah, one can never have too many backups! No, it wasn’t the power cable coming loose cos I know which was the power cable so I did try to tighten that. It was something else, I don’t even remember what it is exactly now.

    zhuzhu8376: OMG. What a nightmare story. I can totally understand your pain and frustration, man. Harddisk fail is the worse, especially if you don’t have backup. Eek. Really kena the sinking feeling!

    Yoi: What do you mean “the appendix would just degenerate away after it is no longer needed”? You mean it has ever been needed before?

    Well, if you’re talking about poor design, I think the entire human body is poor design because we are so prone to a zillion kinds of sickness, mutations and mulfunctions.

    RN1209: Haha… yes, I’m a prophet of my own life, woohoo! (Well, self-fulfiling prophecy comes to mind, haha.) Okay to be honest, I never hook up my own computers (except the time when I was in Australia, then that was no choice), so cable management is never my responsibility. Haha. :P I let my geek partners do it for me. Eh? You know Dragon?

    Jesta: Thank you. Your compliment is much appreciated.

    aaron: I discovered the coin after taking the picture, when looking at the picture for editing. Haha. :P

  9. Avatar

    “I thought maybe something had come loose, so I checked all the plugs connected to the back of the CPU. ”
    CPU -> Core Processing Unit, alias the Processor… I gues your talkin bout the outside of the PC [dont know how is it called in English, one of the curses of knowing two languages…].

    Glad to hear you didnt get eaten AND you got your jun… PC fixed ;]

  10. Avatar

    Er… click on the one that says “32 comments >>” on the right side of the bar. Then wait for the thing to load and type in your comment lor.. :P

  11. Avatar

    Devorlast: We call the outside of the PC the “CPU casing”, but usually shorten it to CPU for convenience. So, when we say CPU, it can mean 2 things. :P

  12. Avatar

    @Jesta it wasn’t spam. It was a video where you could insert someone’s name dynamically and it would show up throughout the video in an amusing newscasting of praise of that individual. I thought it would be amusing for Sheylara to see it with her name all through it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.