Papaya Boys: 1; Edison-Gillian sex scandal: 0

Two nights ago, the Goonfather came home from work, excited.

“I want to let you hear something!”


“It’s the most irritating tune in the whole world!!”

I narrow-eyed him. “If it’s irritating, why are you so excited? And I don’t want to hear it.”

“No, no, you must hear it. It’s one of those, when you’re forced to listen to it over and over again, you start to love it.”


And then he played it and I went OMG WTF is wrong with you?

He said his Filipino colleague has it for his ring tone, and his phone rings like all the time, so the whole department is forced to hear the tune all day.

Apparently, the song is all the rage in the Philippines and it comes with a dance.

“I show you!!” enthused the Goonfather.

“OMG no.” My face turned as pale as a bleached egg as I looked at him pleadingly not to initiate me into his newfound religion.

“Here!!!!” he said.

The Goonfather grinned. “It’s the Papaya Dance!”

I exploded. “Why the orange fizz soda are you watching a bunch of scrawny, half-naked boys wiggle in front of a webcam?”

“It’s funny! Hahahahaha! My colleague was dancing it in the office and playing his ring tone and irritating the hell out of everyone.”

He then started opening up a zillion tabs on his browser to download more Papaya Dance videos. YouTube is apparently flooded with them. There are 1,700 results when you search “Papaya Dance”.

I exploded again.

“Why are you not searching for Edison Chen Gillian Chung sex scandal pictures and videos like all other normal males in the whole world are doing right now?!!”

“What’s that?”

I gaped at him.

“You have not heard of the Edison Chen Gillian Chung (and apparently Cecilia Chung too) sex scandal??!!!”


He got up and started doing the Papaya Dance, winking at me suggestively.

“What is wrong with you??! OMG DON’T DO THAT!!!”

“What Edison?”

“Edison Chen!!!”

“Oh yeah, I think I heard before. Some actor is it?”


“What scandal?”

I took a deep breath and counted to three.

“I can’t believe you know of some stupid papaya gig but you don’t know the Edison Gillian sex scandal. It’s everywhere on the Internet right now!! You can’t go on the Internet and not see it!!”

“Who cares about some stupid actors having sex?”

He finished dancing and played the next Papaya Dance video on his browser.

The crazy Papaya tune filled the room once again.

32 thoughts on “Papaya Boys: 1; Edison-Gillian sex scandal: 0

  1. Avatar

    Good man, the Goonfather. The world should clone a few more of him, and then these so-called celebs will be pay real wages instead of the kind of outrageous wages like millions a year along with all other real actors… and the paparazzi will be out of business.

    Only in Xizor2000’s fantasy world…. * sigh *

  2. Avatar

    Sis, show GF that thing I showed you, that will traumatise him somewhat for you to stop him doing the papaya dance. =P

  3. Avatar

    So the Goonfather’s colleague if a Filipino… hahaha! Now that’s cool. Post video of the Goonfather doing the Papaya por favor! :D

  4. Avatar

    Hahaha, I have that ringtone too! And the Goonfathers colleague a Filipino, cool. Post video of the Goonfather doing the papaya por favor!

  5. Avatar

    Do I hear the “Macarena” being played in the background? Or before that the “Birdie Song”? There seems to be something about an incredibly annoying tune combined with an incredibly stupid dance that switches off the reasoning part of the human brain.

  6. Avatar

    oh wait.. ‘that’ site.. is not down..
    btw after the flash loaded u can reload the site..
    cos it would use the flash on your browser cache..
    so the timing would matched..

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