May I entice you

Durians!

 

So, you know your best friend is bonkers when, one day, you innocently send them a Telegram and this conversation happens.

 

 

Like, I can’t even. What kind of friend starts a durian business just, like, out of the blue. KNOWING that their best friend is dying in the UK without access to durians, especially during a particularly great season when durians are amazing and cheap and everyone on Facebook is letting you know it, with their durian statuses every single day?

Honestly. People in Singapore, you shuddup about durians now or… or… face my wrath! Eh? I shall… scold you! Hey? How would you like that? Face my scoldage if you do not cease and desist the durian posts immediately!

*Angry Face*

Alright, now that you have all been properly scolded, I shall be a good friend and talk about Wen’s durians for a bit. (Still angry!)

 

DurianFever.sg

 

One day, like, so recently, Wen and her equally bonkers husband looked at each other and went, “Hey, let’s sell durians!” “Okay!”

Just like that. As if being two-month-newly-weds weren’t enough excitement.

So they woke up the next day and started a durian delivery business called Durian Fever. Without telling me.

Wen says her durians are damn good. Yeah, rub it in. They only deal in the Mao Shan Wang variety, which is the best, in my opinion. I do trust her taste because she and I are really fussy about durians and we always went out of our way and paid top dollar for the best.

 

Durians

 

So far, I hear that business is doing well. One day, a government agency randomly rang up to order tons of vacuum packed durians for a foreign army to take back home. What?

I am all kinds of jealous, stuck in the UK where the only durians you can get are probably dodgy frozen ones that cost a bomb and taste like whatever durian-hating Westerners say durians taste like after being fed lousy cheap ones.

 

Vacuum packed durians

 

Oh, yeah, incidentally, today is my birthday. I wish I were in Singapore because I really want durians! But I haven’t celebrated my birthday in Singapore since 2010. I haven’t had a birthday cake in eight years. (I’m fussy about cakes, too.)

That’s okay, and there’s no need to wish me a happy birthday. Just go order some delicious durians from Naughty Wen. You can get a friend discount if you quote “Sheylara”. I’ll be very jealous but never mind, I’ll live.

 

An artistically placed durian

 

Okay, I need to go have some fun now to take my mind off certain things!

And, here, I dug up an old photo of me and Wen for old times’ sake. This was taken in Genting Highlands nine years ago! We were so young and carefree, lol. (And I could have all the cake and durian I wanted.)

 

Old photo of Sheylara and Nanny Wen

 

Click here to order durians and get a $5 discount by quoting “Sheylara”.

Then, don’t tell me about it!!

 
 
 

My ugly dumplings and amazing durians

We made dumplings on National Day.

Or, rather, Cindy made the filling and allowed us to mess up her place wrapping the dumplings. We made a whole lot of assorted ones.

I’ve never wrapped dumplings in my life. And I’m a disaster in the kitchen. But I gamely tried to copy what the rest did, and came up with this:

I call them The Ugly Dumplings.

I made three of these and just couldn’t get the hang of it, so decided to stick to the easier ones.

But you know what? They don’t look too bad after being cooked.

We had a feast! Cindy cooked a giant pot of Buddha Jump Over The Wall which is arguably the best I ever had. I drank five bowls of it!!

I don’t have a photo of it because soup is boring to photograph. But I have a photo of black bean pork ribs:

And curry fishballs:

Cindy is an amazing cook!

And I’m a glutton.

Barely two hours after a super dinner, I made everyone go for durians.

It’s all Wang Wang’s fault. When we were watching fireworks from Cindy’s balcony, she got all excited because, she told us, “I can see the durian!”

She was, of course, referring to the Esplanade, but she made me think of durians and that gave me a huge craving and I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

So, even before our dinner was properly digested, a few of us drove off to the Four Seasons Durians Cafe.

The durians are freaking expensive but they are freaking awesome!

We bought two XO D24 durians and two Cat Mountain King durians for $120 and that’s after a discount.

Three of us shared most of it because Morte was having a sore throat and couldn’t eat too much.

After eating Cat Mountain King durians, you don’t want to eat any other durians, ever!!

Actually, I don’t know if it’s called Cat Mountain King. That’s a direct translation from Chinese.

Don’t care lah. It’s damn nice and I died and went to heaven eating them.

Pure ecstasy!

Here’s a nicely shaped durian which looks tough, but is so soft and creamy inside once you sink your teeth in it.

Wang Wang and Unker Kell got so drunk with the joy of durian feasting that they started doing strange things with their durians.

I was so full after all that durian!!! The CMK ones are especially potent because they’re very thick and creamy.

And the nice durian uncle gave us a complimentary packet to bring home! Wow!

I could eat durians every day!!!

Nah, I probably couldn’t.

I’d go broke.