Something cute for a Sunday evening!

The latest from icanhascheezburger:

It’s funny, although not necessarily my favourite lolcat.

Just thought to mention it cos it reminds me of Conehead Zombie in Plants vs Zombies!

Read the description!

The PVZ guide to all the plants and zombies has the most irrelevant but funny stories.

A few of my favourite ones:

Too funny and cute for words! I would like to kiss the writer of these funny descriptions.

No, I’m no longer obsessed over Plants vs. Zombies. Because I’m obsessed over Dynomite, instead.

No, no. Really. I managed to get some work done last night and today. Slowly but surely ticking off all the items on my planner!

You might be asking, then, why am I reading lolcats when I’m supposed to be working?

Cos I follow ICHC on Plurk so I get updates instantly lah. I have a few things open on my screen 24/7 and Plurk is one of them. Gmail is another.

Awright, back to work!

Heh.

What I really feel like doing now is curl up in bed to read.

I’m getting into learning about 16th Century English court via not entirely reliable sources (Philippa Gregory novels) but all the same being more educational than reading, say, Archie comics (which I actually downloaded onto my iPhone).

But, in the interest of self-preservation, I shall not succumb to temptation. Not all the time, anyway, striving perhaps for an optimistic ratio of nine out of 10 times in which I should say “Bugger it all and give me my book.”

No, really. Temptation is evil and should not be yielded to nor employed, except during times when you need to bribe someone into, say, buying you a camera when you already have one but just because you’re greedy and want another one.

In such a case, bribery should offer something of value to your target.

You should discreetly pull him aside and whisper soothingly, even seductively, into his ear: “I will stop drawing funny comics about you if you buy me a new camera.”

And then you hope that he hasn’t yet fulfilled his quota of temptation-yielding for the week and will pick yours.

This has been a public service announcement.

You don’t have to thank me in the event of success in your own similar experiments.

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See also: The Goonfather and the iPhone.

We were at Tanglin Mall. The boys had had a bit too much to drink at Chili’s. They came upon a BMW.

“Awwright, man, bro!” said the Goonfather to Unker Kell, “When did you collect your new BMW Z3?”

“BWAHAHAHAHA,” said Unker Kell, “Come, let me take you out for a spin!”

The two tottered drunkenly over to the BMW and attempted to get in together, all the while laughing and insulting each other, as men are wont to do.

They discovered that they couldn’t both fit in the car at the same time.

“Okay, okay,” said the Goonfather, “You sit tight. I’ll drive!”

After a bit, they both gave up and collapsed into a heap of useless guffawing Y chromosomes.

Epic fail.

Over the past few days, my crazy friends have shared with me articles describing some really strange things happening around the world.

Seeing as how my friends seem to be spending all their time surfing the Internet reading strange things, it’s no wonder they’re crazy.

Allow me to spread the craziness.

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Multi-purpose bra for golfing babes
Contributed by Elyxia.

Apparently, lingerie giant Triumph has produced a bra that doubles up as a putting mat. It even comes with pockets to store golf balls.

There’s also a matching skirt which, when removed, can be unrolled into a flag that says “Be Quiet.”

I’m not sure the flag will serve its purpose when golfer chicks start unrolling their skirts and removing their bras in the middle of golfing practice.

Read the full story here.

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China farmers build fake mountain
Contributed by Elyxia.

This is hilarious. Disney wants to build a theme park in Shanghai, right? So, the peasants currently living in the area where the new Disneyland would be erected have started building structures around the area as fast as possible.

Supposedly, land with structures fetch a higher selling price. One of the structures the farmers have built include a fake mountain.

Like, seriously? How does one build a mountain?

Read the full story here.

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Exploding chair kills teen
Contributed by Unker Kell.

Um, this is a very scary story. I’m sure all of us have sat on one of these chairs at some point of our lives. Some of you are probably sitting on one right now.

This chair (picture above) exploded without provocation and killed the teenage boy who was sitting on it.

So, please keep that in mind the next time you go chair shopping or, in fact, the next time you sit on a chair.

Read the full disturbing story here.

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Er… lucky her?
Contributed by Morte.

“A woman with a medical condition that makes her have more than 300 orgasms a day says she has finally found happiness — thanks to her “sexually-charged” new boyfriend.”

Well, just remember that the grass always seems greener on the other side.

Read the full story here.

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World’s funniest complaint letter
Contributed by Unker Kell.

This is a bit long but it is an absolute must-read.

An airline customer sends a witty complaint letter to Sir Richard Branson, owner of the Virgin brand. He also provides a series of photos to substantiate his claims.

Read the full story here.