The Goonfather has a new toy!

There I was, busy doing my work, and he comes along and says, “LOOK AT MY NEW TOY!”

It’s still in the box at this point of time.

I said, “WOW!” to make him happy, and waited.

He repeated, “My new toy!”

I said, “Wow!” again and waited for him to open the box to show me.

He said, “Don’t you want to take photos of it???”

-_-”

So, here I am, doing an unboxing post to humour him.

So the first thing you see when you open the box is a nice, glossy box with strange characters on it.

The Goonfather asks, “Is that supposed to read ‘Alienware’?”

I said, “How should I know? As if I can read alien.”

I thought the machine was inside the box so I was excited to open it. But I was cheated. Inside it is all the boring shit like cables and installers.

The actual gem is hidden underneath the glossy box!

Nice.

Presenting the Alienware M11x!

Well, ok, I don’t have fancy studio lighting and equipment so I can’t take a nice photo, so here’s an official photo, instead.

According to the Goonfather, the alien head will glow when you turn the machine on. And you can change the colour of the glow in 256 colours!

The insides glow, too!

Okay, now I am so tempted to buy one for myself and make it glow pink!! And I shall bling the front if I survive blinging my suitcase in the first place.

Alienware specs for all you techies:

11.6″ WideHD 720p WLED (1366×768) display
1.3 mp web cam
8-cell primary battery
Intel Core 2 Duo Processor SU7300 (1.3GHz/800MHz)
Dell Wireless 1520 802.1 In Half Mini-Card
500GB 7200RPM P11 Hard drive
Dell Wireless 365 Bluetooth 2.1
4GB Dual-channel 1066MHz DDR3 SDRAM
Nvidia GT335M

It is a beautiful, wonderful, compact gaming machine!!

While we were in China, the Goonfather spent a lot of time in spas chatting with young Chinese girls who work there.

He found out they’re all addicted to a farming game in QQ, China’s largest social networking site (like Facebook).

I also just found out that many articles have been written on this addcition that has swept the whole of China. People would wake up in the middle of the night to harvest crops.

(There’s also this rumour reported in the papers that a baby died because the doctor was too busy playing Happy Farm and didn’t attend to the baby in time.)

So, the Goonfather was laughing about the China girls. He was saying, “They’re crazy! They run away from their rural homes to escape a life of farming, and then they come to the city and play farming games!”

I thought that was kinda funny, too, and I laughed.

But, at the same time, I could empathise.

I told the Goonfather, “I hate cooking in real life but I spend all my time cooking in Cafe World!”

He stared at me for a few seconds, gave a big sigh, and didn’t say anything more.

Then, the next thing you know, we’re back in Singapore and getting ready to sleep and he springs up and says, “Oh, wait! I need to go harvest my crops!”

T_T

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See also: The Goonfather and the iPhone.

Many questions have been raised over yesterday’s post on the Goonfather’s kidney stone, so I’ve made an FAQ to answer them all in one place.

Did the stone come out the pee hole?

Yes.

Did he bleed?

No.

Was it painful when it came out?

He was on heavy painkillers when it came out, so it wasn’t that bad. There was just a quick stabbing pain. Certainly, compared to the pain when the stone was acting up inside, the shooting out was nothing.

Where was he when it came out?

He was at home and it was the middle of the night. He had been discharged from the hospital because they had already done all the tests, and determined that he could be kept comfortable with strong painkillers. He just had to drink a lot of water to pee the stone out and then he would be alright.

How did he retrieve the stone?

He had been peeing into a container since the day he was discharged. (At the hospital, they gave him a sieve to pee through, lol.)

But because it was the middle of the night that time and he was groggy with sleep, he forgot to use the container and peed right into the toilet bowl.

Then he felt a stab as the stone shot out and he thought, “Oh shit I forgot the container.”

Very luckily, somehow, because he had peed on the side of the bowl instead of directly in the water, the stone stuck to the side instead of sliding down into the water!

He was able to retrieve the stone without difficulty.

Did you guys name the stone?

Duh, no.

Will he keep it as a memento?

He would have but for the fact that it’s now a pile of dust, maybe discarded. It had to be sent to the lab to be ground up and analysed.

The analysis is supposed to tell the patient whether the stone was caused by bad diet or by chemical imbalance in the body, which would then require further treatment. In most cases, it’s diet.

His results haven’t come back yet.

Are those sharp edges?

Yes, sharp. And very hard.

If there are anymore questions, I’ll answer them in the comments.

Remember, you really don’t want this to happen to you. Try to eat healthy but if you can’t, drink more water to compensate!

I debated a while before finally deciding to post up photos of the Goonfather’s kidney stone.

While the stone itself isn’t gross, I suppose the idea of it is somewhat disturbing, if not gross, and some people might not stomach it.

Still, in the name of science and discovery, I present to you…

THE STONE

Some perspective first. It measure 3mm on its widest span, small enough to pass out naturally but large enough to cause inordinate measures of pain.

Having a kidney stone like this move around the internal organs, causing infection and swelling, is one of the most painful things to endure, according to the doctor, more painful even than childbirth.

It looks really fragile, like it could break into pieces anytime but it’s really sturdy so I could move it around without destroying it.

It’s really hard to position in different angles cos it’s so tiny!

And sorry the pics are so grainy. I have bad lighting at home.

Anyway, the Goonfather is alright now although he thought he was going to die at the time the stone was raising a mutiny in his innards.

The doctor has asked him to avoid taking a bunch of stuff, including all caffeinated drinks/food, strawberries, blueberries, beetroot, spinach, cashew nuts and macademia nuts.

Kind of strange but these things will apparently cause a reccurence faster.

Well, according to the Goonfather, this is something you will never want to experience. And I’ve seen him experience it so I’m absolutely with him.

So be sure to drink lots of water all the time and cut down on the coffee!