Journal – November 11-13

Journal - November 11-13

 

Transcription

11 Sunday

We watched the House of Cards Season 5 recap and realised we couldn’t remember a single thing about it, so we decided to watch the whole series again before starting on the new one. And that’s how we always end up watching TV shows at least twice!

Last night, we watched Seven Psychopaths (movie) and I kept feeling deja vu throughout. It was nearly the end before I felt convinced I’d watched it before. Piers didn’t feel any familiarity until the final scene and then he was, like, “Oh yeah, I think we’ve seen this.” He’s worse than me!

On the bright side, I got to enjoy a really great movie again with fresh eyes!

12 Monday

I forgot the WI meeting last week so Gwen invited me over to decorate my Christmas crackers for our Christmas dinner. She’s so sweet, not wanting anyone to be left out. I had fun with the task!

13 Tuesday

I have procrastinated doing up my study room for a year now! Been using this crappy desk while my real desk sits downstairs. I just haven’t had the time nor energy to start the whole process of moving stuff and furniture out, painting the room, then moving everything back in.

But I have been invited to submit a photo of my workspace for an Instagram thing and I don’t want it to be this crappy desk I’ve hated so much! So I’m finally getting the process going. Vanity is a great motivator! Now I just need someone or something to motivate me to do all the other rooms!

 

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Journal – November 8-10

Journal - 08-10

 

Transcription

08 Thursday

I completely forgot there’s a WI meeting tonight! I’ve been so busy catching up on my bujo pages I have no mind for anything else! Vivian showed up to pick me up as usual and I was like huh? What are you doing here? I felt quite bad about that!

09 Friday

Stephen Fry made me yawn, lol. I was listening to Harry Potter book 3 and he was voicing Harry in a yawny voice about to go to sleep and that made me actually yawn, haha.

* * * * *

Tonight, Piers called me geeky for drawing loads of lines and boxes in my bujo for planners and trackers. Then later he called me weird for doing yoga poses that he doesn’t recognise as popular yoga poses. As if he knows anything about yoga!

10 Saturday

What a crazy day! I was doing C25K in the garden and all these things happened!

  • A small tree had fallen over so I interrupted my session a bit to photograph it.
  • Then I tried to photograph our big red tree cos it’s so pretty.
  • 10 minutes in, it started to rain so I tried to continue my run indoors, which was quite hard.
  • Few minutes later, the rain stopped and I had to put on my shoes again to go outside.
  • There was a big rainbow in the sky so I spent some time photographing it!
  • When I was ready to focus on my C25K fully, a fly flew into my eye! I had to run indoors to wash it out but I don’t know if I succeeded.
  • After all that, I felt I had to do my session all over again. What should have taken 30 mins in the end took over an hour!

 

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Journal – November 5-6

Journal - Nov 5-6

 

Transcription

Piggyback

There has been no movement from the ladybirds in the bathroom since Oct 26 when Daddy Ted went for a day’s jaunt. The five are always on the same spot on the curtain in a cluster, most of the time facing each other in a circle as if they were petals around a flower. Tonight, though, I saw Mary (one of the babies) sitting on Ted, as if he were giving her a piggyback! How adorable is that?! When I went back to look an hour later, she was off his back and they were back in their regular cluster.

Couch to 5K

I have decided to do C25K, not out of any noble sense of purpose but because I had an empty space to fill in my habit tracker, lol. Nevertheless I shall feel proud that I took my first session today. It felt good afterwards!

Gratitude

I’m grateful for new toys to play with! Today’s post brought me 12 brush pens (more colours yay), 15 gelatos (something new for me to try) and 3 water brushes (also something new I hope I won’t be a complete mess at)!

Opposing Wishes

One of our big trees have turned beautifully red but all the rest remain green. There are some red ones in the lower garden but they’re small and can’t really be seen from my window. I said to Piers, “I wish we had more red trees and fewer evergreens.” His reply: “I wish all our trees were evergreens. Then I wouldn’t have so many leaves to rake!” I have no argument for that. Tsk. Beauty always has a price!

 

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Journal – November 3-4

Journal - November 3-4

 

Transcription

Gratitude

I’m so grateful for my new Uniqlo Heattech t-shirts and leggings. They’re so comfy and warm! I wish I’d thought of buying them way earlier!

Forget

It’s the first anniversary of dad’s death today. I’ve always found it morbid to commemorate someone’s death. And isn’t it awfully sad to specifically remind yourself of a terrible loss? I guess people do it because they don’t want to forget their departed loved ones. But it’s not so easy to forget, is it? I don’t think I can ever forget the space he used to fill in our lives. I can’t ever forget the suffering he bravely endured for years. I can’t forget his smiles when he was happy. Why do I need a day to remember what I can’t forget?

Allergic

I bought a secondhand book last year that I haven’t been able to read because it triggers my dust and mould allergy. It’s “What Do I Do When I Want To Do Everything” and it’s out of print so I can’t get safe new copies. So I decided to photocopy it. OMG never again. It took me over 2 mind-numbing hours and a lot of muscle effort because of the stiff spine and it being bigger than the photocopy glass. This book has now cost me £30 including the photocopy ink and paper, and hours of allergies!

Timing

I’ve been doing daily walks for three months now without major health incidences, so I feel ready to take on Couch to 5K. Except it’s getting colder and more miserable by the day and I’ve been getting my daily steps indoors. But I can’t run indoors, so do I brave the cold or wait till spring?

 

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Journal – November 1-2

Journal - November 1-2

 

Transcription

Life and Death

I dreamt that I tried to commit suicide. It surprised me because I haven’t felt suicidal recently. It’s also the first time I’ve dreamt such a thing and it weirds me out a bit. I’ve been feeling largely positive, even happy, the last few months, even though I never did stop being aware that there are unresolved issues and unfixable things that plague me.

Even in the glow of positivity and happiness, there is a stress that will never go away because life can never be the neat little package you want it to be. I don’t want to kill myself at the moment but I wouldn’t mind ceasing to exist.

In my dream, the attempt failed and I woke up feeling disappointed, both in the dream and in real life. Where do I go from here? I don’t know. Keep trying, die trying, to fix my life as well as I can. Look outside the window and focus on the good things.

Gratitude

I’m grateful for all the people in the world who make the world a better place with kindness, love and compassion.

Lifeguard

I will never stop being amazed at Piers’ superpower. We were at our pond and it’s pretty chaotic. Dragonflies flitting around, dead leaves and weeds and ripples on the surface, uneven muddy ground on the bottom. In the middle of that, he suddenly pointed out a tiny splashing that wouldn’t quit and said a dragonfly was drowning. It was far away in the middle of a really huge pond and I honestly couldn’t tell. But Piers saw it and managed to rescue it with a ridiculously long wooden beam that’s used to sweep pond weeds. Makes me speechless!

 

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