I finally managed to play Pirates of the Burning Sea last night, after four days of not being able to touch it since installing it. Well, I only had a few hours to play but I’ve got some first impressions.

There are only three things I like about it.

1. The costumes.
2. The music.
3. The poses.

That’s it. Pretty lame things to like about a game. Haha.

The costumes are pretty and authentic and very customisable, with many choices for mixing and matching, and a huge colour palette to dye your clothes.

I chose a black-and-red theme. Yes, very safe and boring, and probably the choice of colour for 80% of the Pirates population. But you can’t deny it looks good and that’s all that matters.

Meet Sheylara Scarlett, my pirate, captain of her own ship (albeit a lousy newbie ship):

I love how I can wear sexy cleavage-revealing clothes in MMORPGs.

I would have gone for a pink-and-white theme but the pastels in the game are dodgy and they all end up looking a pale dirty yellow, somehow.

The music is fantastic. You feel like you’re in your own Pirates of the Caribbean movie. There’s piratey carnival music when you’re gallivanting about town, and there’s piratey battle music when you’re battling. Cool.

And the poses. By that, I mean the way the avatar stands when it’s stationery. There are like five or so different positions which your character assumes randomly.

Other than all that, the game is more frustrating than fun. For me, at least. (There are certainly no lack of PotBS fans raving about the game.)

Some of the things I don’t like:

1. The tutorials are stupid and redundant because they don’t teach you shit.
2. You can’t jump in the game. I’m so used to jumping in MMORPGs that I feel crippled not being able to do it.
3. There’s no tailoring! I can’t make clothes! (I’m always a tailor in MMORPGs.)
4. The learning curve is very steep and the poorly-designed tutorials certainly don’t help.
5. The UI is laggy. Like when you mouseover something, the tooltip takes two seconds to appear. Or when you try to change your ship’s weapon with a right-click, your mouseover doesn’t highlight until 50 years later, by which time your ship has already been sunk by the enemy and your loot plundered and your crew raped.

The game is really very hard to excel in, with lots of strategising if you want to rule the seas.

At this point of time, I have trouble even telling the stern and the bow, or the port and the starboard, apart. I certainly don’t have time to worry about picking the right ship, picking the right weapons, choosing the right side to shoot at and shoot from, taking advantage of the wind direction to out-manoeuvre the enemy, while at the same time making sure your crew doesn’t drink up all the rum before the battle is over.

And I haven’t even started talking about the economy aspect of the game. Building warehouses and factories, harvesting raw materials to produce goods you can sell to other players for a tidy profit, doing it without getting yourself killed because you have to visit enemy ports to get stuff that you need.

OMG.

This is a game for people who have too much time on their hands.

Not me.

I have like maybe two hours a week. Just enough time to sit in the tavern and listen to the bartender wax lyrical over the new wench in town.

I suppose the game concept is pretty cool. I just don’t have time to get into the thick of things. So I’m just gonna log in when I can, try not to die too much and live off the generosity of my guildmates, assuming I get into a guild (called Society in PotBS) soonish.

In the meantime, I’m a clueless lass pretending to be a captain.

Sheylara Scarlett plays on Antigua.

Categories: Gaming Notebook
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This year, like last year, we welcomed the new Chinese year by counting down at Loyang Tua Pek Kong.

It was so very, very crowded.

It was so crowded we had trouble finding a spot to place our offerings.

(There were like two or three other tables like this, all full.)

It was so crowded we had trouble finding a spot to stick our candles in without burning our hands.

At first, I felt a little weird taking photographs. It’s a religious place, a place of worship, after all. But then I saw these men standing on stepladders taking photographs and I felt better about it.

The temple had its own still camera and video camera crew documenting the entire celebration.

The celebration was really huge. There were performances all through the night.

As it neared midnight, more and more devotees started flocking to the outdoor area to crowd around the stage, awaiting coundown.

A smaller motley group crowded around the God of Wealth (also called God of Prosperity and God of Fortune) but their eyes were turned towards the stage.

And then it was countdown time and then midnight and then fireworks!

Once countdown was done, everyone flocked to the God of Wealth.

Joss sticks were distributed to every person and we all stood there and waited.

I think we waited about 45 minutes or an hour, just standing there while monks chanted.

And then there was a commotion and the God of Wealth’s statue was showered with golden confetti. The lions started dancing.

And the dragon.

Apparently, the God of Wealth had arrived, but I didn’t see him.

We were then allowed into the ceremony area to stick our joss sticks into the urn, bathe ourselves in holy smoke, and throw coins at the God of Wealth’s coins.

The giant coins stood at the foot of the statue and people flocked there to toss their own coins at the coins to make awful clanging sounds.

And then it was suddenly over and everyone flocked elsewhere.

But then, just as sudden, a queue formed where my friends and I were still standing, trying to recover from the overwhelming festivities.

This is no ordinary queue. This is the longest queue you’ve ever seen.

The picture above shows the tail end of it. It covers the entire outdoor area at the back of the temple.

It snakes into the roofed compound.

Without knowing what it was for, the Goonfather joined the queue. I decided to go investigate to see where the queue ended and what it was for.

I followed it into the roofed compound.

It went right through the central compound where people do their praying and worshipping.

I had trouble taking photos in there because it was too crowded. The queue was fighting for space with other worshippers who were going about their usual business with joss sticks and offerings.

So I stuffed my camera into my pocket and tried to push my way through the congestion. I finally emerged outside, triumphant, thinking that I would finally get to see what the queue was all about.

I was mometarily blinded by floodlights outside the temple, but when my vision recovered, I saw that the queue was still extending out further than I could see.

It went out into the main road and curled around the temple’s perimeter, then snaked into the compound again through a side entrance.

Will it never end??

The queue led back indoors, back into the worshipping fray, where it nearly joined the first leg of that queue that was fighting for space with worshippers.

With my trusty camera, I followed the queue up a cute little bridge.

And then, finally, I found myself at the end of the rainbow.

So, where’s the pot of gold?

There’s no gold.

But there’s something better.

The

God

of

Wealth

himself!!!

OMG!!!

Ok, well, he’s actually human, but he’s dressed in the God of Wealth’s costume and, supposedly, he has the spirit of the god in him through ritual, or something like that.

So, once you’ve reached the end of the queue, you were able to buy a lucky golden coin ($2 only) from the “god” himself and personally shake his hand to receive his rich blessings.

How cool is that?

It took me almost ten minutes to investigate the queue and run back to the Goonfather to report my findings.

“You’re going to be stuck in the queue for 20 years,” I said. “It goes all the way outside the temple, around it, then back in again.”

He said, “Okay.”

“I’m going outside to eat ice cream.”

“Okay.”

I went outside with Elyxia and Wang Wang to get some ice cream while we waited for the guys.

Ten minutes later, the guys came out.

“You gave up?” I asked.

“We cut queue,” said the Goonfather.

“How??????????!!! Can YOu???!!!!”

“Wahahahaha,” he said.

What he did was buy this lucky package from the stalls set up inside the temple.

The package consists of two mandarin oranges, a prosperity cake, a lucky pendant and a lucky golden coin (the same coin that everyone was queueing up to buy). His package cost him $10, but he figured paying more was better than queueing up.

AND he got to shake the God of Wealth’s hand by just going up to the man-god from the side and asking, “Can I shake your hand?”

So the Goonfather got his handshake and his lucky coin without queueing up.

He was mighty pleased about it.

I was pleased with my ice cream.

Need more ice cream!

Categories: Regular Blogs
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The most stressful time of the year is upon us again.

It really is very stressful.

All the preparations that have to be made way in advance:

• Buy new clothes and shoes and handbag
• Buy new towels and bedsheets
• Buy snacks and bak kwa and drinks
• Spring clean the house
• Wash the car

We’re talking about the Chinese New Year, of course. Buying new things and cleaning the house is supposed to bring good luck in the coming year. The snacks are for feeding the hungry hordes of relatives that will troop endlesly to your house in the 15 days of the Chinese New Year.

Fortunately, not being head of the household, I’m exempted from some things. Like preparing food for reunion dinner and buying mandarin oranges and decorating the house with too many red-coloured items. I just need to take care of myself and my own bedroom. And whatever snacks I buy I eat myself. BWahaha.

But I’ve been so busy I haven’t had time to buy new clothes (or anything else for the matter). As a last resort, I’m wearing something I received as a Christmas present which I haven’t even tried on yet.

But we did get bedsheets. The Goonfather dragged me to Aussino a few weeks ago to pick out our CNY bedsheet and quilt cover.

I suggested getting this diabetically sweet, girly pink quilt cover, thinking that the Goonfather will bop me on the head for even considering that he will deign to lie on something that’s gonna make him look like a pouf.

But he said, “Okay!”

Wow. That was pretty shocking.

So we got it, and a lavender bedsheet to match.

Ironically, the quilt cover is shopping themed, which only serves to heighten my stress over not having anything new to wear on the first day of the Chinese New Year.

The feeling is like when you didn’t study for an important exam and you’re hoping the day never comes. Every hour that ticks away adds one more butterfly to the pit of your stomach.

I spent the entire day cleaning my room today when I could have played PotBS instead. What a waste of time, but it had to be done.

To tempt me into buying CNY clothes, the Goonfather had promised to subsidise me $200. But I still never made it to the stores. Now you ought to believe me when I say I’ve been insanely busy.

No rest for the wicked.

After reunion dinner tonight, we’re going to Loyang Tua Pek Kong (Chinese temple) to usher in the new year and mob the God of Wealth together with thousands of other people hoping for some of the god’s wealth to rub off on us.

After that, we’re going to hang out at someone’s house and stay up as late as possible because some Chinese believe that, the later you stay up on the eve of the new year, the longer your parents will live. It’s not logical at all, but since when has tradition ever been logical?

After a night of not sleeping because you want your parents to live forever, the morning starts early with visitations, during which you’ll meet long-lost relatives, relatives you don’t know the names of, relatives you don’t even know are relatives, relatives who force you to eat up all the cookies and bak kwa in their houses, and relatives who ask you the same questions every year, when all you’d rather do is go to sleep on their couch because you haven’t slept all night.

There are people who actually love all this and look forward to it every single year. I really want to know why.

Or maybe not.

Categories: Regular Blogs
21 Comments »

OMG. I’ve gone and done the unthinkable.

I just bought (or rather, the Goonfather just bought) Pirates of the Burning Sea!!

It’s a new MMORPG set in the Caribbean of 1720 where you get to be a pirate or swashbuckler or naval officer.

I’ve never even really liked pirates and piratey stuff. Well, I do adore Captain Jack Sparrow, but that’s largely because I love Johnny Depp and that’s the extent of my pirate fandom.

I’m writing this blog now while my game is patching because once the patch is done, I will never have time to do anything else anymore.

Deciding to play this game is a totally impulsive move and totally nuts. I now have a full-time temp office job, on top of which I still have auditions and shoots, on top of which I have this blog to update daily, on top of which I just joined a choir with our first public performance slated for August.

Where will I find time to play an MMORPG?

I didn’t even know of the game’s existence until like a week ago when the game launched and the Goonfather started arrrrr-ing at me like a pirate, at the oddest random moments.

“Arrrrrrrrr!!” he would say, twisting his mouth in a way that makes him look more like Popeye the Sailorman than a badass pirate captain.

And I would ask him, “What the hell?”

And he would say, “I’m a pirate! Arrrrrrrrrrrrr!”

He deliberated for a week before finally caving in and buying the game, in the process also buying a second copy for me.

Many of my friends have already started (or are thinking of) playing it, so talk has been revolving around this game, which makes me all excited for no logical reason. I’m not really excited over being a pirate and sailing my own ship and waging sea battles. I’m more excited about playing with friends.

You can’t possibly know what fun is until you play an MMORPG with real life friends.

Well… I dunno. I’ve been (and still am) really insanely busy and I have no time to play games.

But I can feel the gamer’s blood still running strong within me. I am hyperventilating with excitement over starting a new game which I don’t have much of an interest in playing!

Siao lah.

Categories: Gaming Notebook
14 Comments »

[Photos by Justyn Olby]

You may have noticed that I’m wearing leg warmers in the first two photos but not the last two.

Totally Justyn’s doing. He’s on a misguided mission to rid me of radical cutesy outfits forever.

When we met at the studio, one of the first things he said was, “I hope you didn’t bring big shoes and socks today.”

“No,” I assured him. “I decided to be kind to you.”

When I put on this outfit, he grumbled. “Socks.”

“Back up a little, will you please, so we can get your ugly socks in the picture.”

I protested. “They’re not ugly and they’re not socks.”

“And… where do socks cover? Foot and legs, right? What do these cover?”

That sounded logical, but it wasn’t quite right, either.

I just couldn’t figure it out because I was focused on trying to look like a dumb decorative ornament while Justyn snapped away.

(And he’ll probably tell you that I am one so I don’t even have to try.)

But I had to say something, so I said, “These are leg warmers, excuse me.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he said. “Big difference. What is the difference between a sock and a leg warmer?”

“The length?” suggested Mark, who was my videographer that day.

“Well, what about knee high socks?” argumentative Justyn wanted to know.

“Leg warmers are sort of loose,” I said, pulling at them to demonstrate.

“My socks are loose,” he retorted.

He just never quits.

Then, Mark came up with, “They’ve got a hole in the bottom. There you go.”

And that sort of ended the argument and we went on to debate other finer points of fashion.

We had to make a barter trade, too. He’d shoot me with my leg warmers if I also let him shoot me without.

Which was fine with me, except I think I look a little naked, a little underdressed, without them, since I haven’t got any pants on.

But that was perfectly fine with Justyn and Mark, they both agreed.

Of course.

Categories: Fashion Diary
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